Gentlemen, We can rebuild him. We have the technology…and by that I mean Krazy Glue.

At 11:08 on Wednesday, April 29th in the year 2015, the Other Doctor Bearclaw went under for his life saving surgery. With all of your thoughts and prayers and a heroic amount of Krazy Glue this humpty dumpty was put back together again, without all the kings horses, not only were they preoccupied but also because they lack the correct digits for such a delicate surgery, or the kings men, because they simply aren’t qualified for this line of work… The Other Doctor Bearclaw stands moments after coming out of the O.R. looking good as new, if only a little stiffer.

  Almost perfectly the same as before with just a few scars to show for that traumatizing day. Guuuurrlll, the back o’ yo head is ruhdickolous… Along with the bit of the back oh his head, that is forever gone in the land of sucked up toe nails and shaved off dead callous skin that is the office vacuum, for which the most obvious of reasons I did not take that adventure on on the off chance I’d actually find it and not mistake a toe nail chip for the porcelain one. Regardless, its not like he has a brain that’ll seep out anyway. It’s so much easier to pretend I have a PHD when my clients are lacking insides or pain receptors…

But lets rewind a bit to the actual story I was telling before I got sidetracked. So along with his missing head bits, it is most unfortunate that I must alert you to the end of The Other Dr. Bearclaws career as a surgeon. In a most unfortunate surgical complication The Other Dr has lost the use of his arms and legs. As chief decision maker and with complete lack of interest in the patients thoughts on the matter, but also because how many other choices did I have, the good Dr was glued into the position seen above. I honestly have no idea how the third world children who most likely crafted both brothers got the tiny little spring to stretch from one appendage to the other if the torsos don’t come apart. I suspect tiny hands and some kind of witchcraft.

I would like to announce to you all that The Other Dr Bearclaw harbors no hard feeling towards Dr Bearclaw, he is enjoying his new position as head of advertising, the work as he says, ‘Is a new challenge and full of new goals to accomplish.’ I dont know how you go from being a physician to advertising without even a little resentment, but its not my deal so fuck it. I guess the fact that he still gets to wear the outfit helps. …now only if they would invest in some pants.

Look at them, brothers at work…

As for the outcome of Dr Bearclaws case, it was postponed yet again due to the recent accident and is still under investigation. Updates will be supplied as they happen…

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