Is this what it’s like to be a Disney princess?!!…

It’s been a hot minute since I’ve posted anything, but that’s fine because no ones looked at my blog in three days so there’s not much to disappoint lately… Good on ya mates! I’m glad we could be in this together! 

I figure I’ll let you in on another of my dreamland happenings before I have to get to working, to think I ever stopped! Well jokes on you! I haven’t!! 

So the other night I was sleeping my night away, as you do when reaching that point of pure exhaustion… 

In my dreamland I was hanging out at work and Dr Boss Lady’s daughter was working with us on this particular day, always a good time dreamland or not. Apparently I had smuggled in a hamster to work that was the hamster equivalent of little bindirooskies, a cuter hamster I dare you to find! I’m at work and I’m trying to keep the hamster corralled in the area between my two computer screens, and it’s working pretty well for it being a hamster and me not having a cage or pen or anything to hold it in. Some other stuff happens that I can’t remember, as you do with dreams, and then I’m in a car with Tobias driving and Stevini, Urikah, and Matt in the back seat and all of a sudden Tobias whips across the road and parks perpendicular to what would be oncoming traffic, if traffic were in fact oncoming. My window was down and some guy started running towards the car, down the middle of the street. Everyone in the car started yelling to close the window and, unable to figure out if it was a button jobby or one of them crank jobbies, the window didn’t get closed. Then the guy lunges through the window and tries to attack my face with his face. Stevini’s in the back seat yelling out pointers on how best to chokehold the kid and subdue him and everyone else is being generally unhelpful. The cops pull up all in a frenzy and the guy jumps out of both headlock and car and Dukes of Hazzard’s it over the hood as I helpfully yell, ‘don’t run you dumb idiot!’ As the cops release the dogs, which turned out to be the worst police dogs ever because they weren’t very vicious, not to me at least. So the guy is now against the drivers side door plastered against the car crying like a little baby. 

I, on the other hand, was taking a quick mosey down the street while he was being subdued by the authorities, police dogs with me. At some point I end up walking past a room full of my family members having a party and I have somehow ended up in a dress. I’m standing in front of an open door having a conversation with Yagigi when an elephant starts walking by, so I whistle at it and just like a Disney princess, that bitch lifts me up into the air and walks me back to the previous scene with the cops and the car. Apparently! The police department now has an elephant on staff. The Asian poparazzi were there and very interested in the matter and were very upset when the elephant put me down because they didn’t get a good picture and insisted that I unfuck this situation up and get back up there. So I looked at the elephant and, with some all mystical mind bullets, told it to lift me back up. And then there was a cancan line of ratty looking police horses, or horses they found on the side of the road somewhere as I can’t even begin to fathom that the police department would own such decrepit looking ponies. And the all the weird Asian poparazzi were happy and then I woke up and I have no idea what the fuck just happened in my brain… 

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One thought on “Is this what it’s like to be a Disney princess?!!…

  1. Bitch please, ain’t no elephant ever help out us Disney bitches! Fuck you know? Dumbo can fly and that muthafucka was nowhere to be found when I lost my sweet ass glass slippah! Talkin bout driving home in a pumpkin and shit, bitch swerve!

    Like

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